I started the Robotic Gourmand with the promise that I would not review fast food. The McDonalds, KFCs and Taco Times of the world have their own media juggernauts to pump out the word on what products they offer. Plus, hey, we all know what they serve anyway. Well I have broken the promise of no fast food reviews to you all on a couple of occasions. Red Mill and Tacos Guaymas are two that readily come to mind (Though in all fairness they are not what one traditionally thinks of when one thinks of fast food). But there are times though when local fast food can be something of a guilty pleasure. Sometimes it’s little hole in the wall eat-it-and-beat-it places that have some of the best taste for one’s money. At least that was the rationale I gave to myself as I drove to Green Lake to sample Spud Fish & Chips.

“What an odd name for a fish and chips place, Spud.” That’s what I thought over a year and a half ago, my first week in town. Back then I lived up at 85th Street and Wallingford Avenue and I ended up driving past Spud everyday on my way home from work. Being that I was new to the area, living in a dark, dank sub-leased basement apartment and knew no one in the area, I chose to “take-out” my dinners. So I had eaten at Spud once before. “Once before,” remember that as it will come in handy as the story goes on. The restaurant itself is kind of a throwback to when fast food was served more out of a shack and meant to be eaten only by teenagers with high metabolisms. Today corporate fast food is all about shiny plastic and modern equipment. Spud had a few seats inside and several tables outside but overall the environment was less of “stay and visit” as it was “get it to go”. I, however, chose to stay.

My order was for a Single Order with Extra Fish ($8.19). This differs from a plain Single Order ($4.60) in that one gets, well, extra fish. But don’t confuse this with the Double Order ($8.45) which gives you a double portion of the single order’s amount of fish and a double order of fries. After all that I was hoping for some good fish. My memory must not be what it used to be. Either that or it chose to be intentionally blind to where I was at. The two rounds of fish arrived atop a small basket of fries, nearly thin as boards. More like fish cutlets than planks, I wondered if they could be any skinnier. The exterior crust was nicely crisped but unfortunately fairly greasy. Just beneath the surface was a spongy, dough-like consistency that reminded me more of the foam rubber one would find stuffed into their mattress. The fish was only slightly moist and had a distinct fish flavor, a sure sign of its age. As for the fries, they were the limp affair that one finds all too common in many Seattle restaurants. While it’s all good to use fresh potatoes in the making of fries it is important to remember that they need to be double cooked to insure they are crispy and not greasy. My fries would have bent like a reed in the wind and quickly stained any paper product they touched with their grease.

I finished what I could of my “meal” quickly and headed for the door. While there are some independent fast food restaurants in Seattle that deserve some mention I’ll leave Spuds only as - don’t waste your time. I spent more time waiting for my food than I did actually eating it. As I walked down Green Lake back to my car I couldn’t help feeling greasy, bloated, in need of some napkins and a hug. Sometimes hole-in-the-wall is just plain bad.